In which I drift

The water felt warm, a soft lulling comfort that whispered my eyes closed.
In the months that I’ve been here, floating under a gentle sun, I have drifted further and further from the shore I once walked.
The longer I lie here, the less I remember why I fled land for sea. There was something about pain, I think.
Soft waves sluice away thoughts before they can take shape.
This was a safe place to wait.
But there’s no longer a shoreline on my horizon.
Panic hears the skip of my heartbeat as a starter gun, and she charges toward me, eyeballs rolling in a rearing skull. Her hooves syncopate with heartbeats.
The water starts to churn.
And I open my eyes.
I somehow missed this update. Wanted to check in and see how you’re doing, especially with everything going on in the world right now!
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Hello hello, thanks for checking in ❤
Things are going okay, sort of nice to have an excuse to stay in and avoid cramp-triggery things… On the other hand, everything is SUPER WEIRD and anxiety-inducing. I've been feeling completely sucked dry of creativity, so have a bit of avoidance guilt around blogging that I'm trying to manage! How are you doing? I am sending you lots of exceptionally socially-distanced love from across the ocean! xxxxx
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Sometimes circumstances make creativity hard. No need to feel guilty, it’s not like you’re obligated to entertain us! Sending love back from this side of the ocean and making sure it’s thoroughly sanitized first.
As for me – I’m fine until I’m not fine. Have done a lot better than expected overall, but currently getting walloped with anxiety! Hoping it clears up soon.
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